The economists have informed us that most of Pakistanis live below the poverty line. Lets inform the economists that there are three categories of poor Pakistanis. There are poor Pakistanis. There are poorer Pakistanis. And there are poorest Pakistanis. Unfortunately, the economists have lumped all the three categories under one poverty line. Actually, there are three poverty lines one below the other. The poor Pakistanis live immediately below the first line. The poorer Pakistanis live between the first and the second line. And the poorest Pakistanis live far below the third line. We must be thankful to the economists for telling us about the whereabouts of the poor Pakistanis. But they have kept us in the dark about the whereabouts of the rich Pakistanis. Lets enlighten them about it. Incidentally, as there are three categories of the poor Pakistanis so there are three categories of the rich Pakistanis. There are rich Pakistanis. There are richer Pakistanis and there are richest Pakistanis. The rich Pakistanis live immediately below the seventh heaven. The richer Pakistanis live in the seventh heaven. And the richest Pakistanis live far above the seventh heaven. Generally, the poorest Pakistanis relieve themselves of their misery by killing themselves. Some eat poisonous pills. Those who cannot afford pills, kill themselves by jumping into the rivers. Their dead bodies are eaten by the fishes. The fishes are eaten by the rich Pakistanis. Thus, the rich Pakistanis unconsciously commit cannibalism. There are two kinds of jungles: Natural jungles and human jungles. In a natural jungle, the strong animals kill the weak animals for eating them. In a human jungle, the powerful citizens kill the poor citizens. But there is a fundamental difference between the killing of animals by animals and the killing of poor human beings by rich human beings. Animals kill animals straightforwardly and bluntly. But the rich human beings use various sorts of political and economic weapons to kill the poor human beings. As there is an abundance of natural jungles so there is an abundance of human jungles in the world. But unfortunately, almost all the human jungles are situated in the East. Today, the gravest problem of the East is how to transform a human jungle into a safe haven for the poor citizens. If in a country most of the citizens are extremely poor, their poverty is a gift to them from the rulers. In this regard, the rulers are extremely generous. As they grow richer and richer, they ensure that the poor grow poorer and poorer. As the poor sink deeper and deeper into poverty, the rulers grow stronger and stronger. Obviously, empty stomachs are extremely obedient slaves. But full stomachs are extremely dangerous creatures. In a poor country, most of the citizens are extremely miserable and only a small minority is fabulously rich. The rich rule the country. They firmly believe that they are born to eat the masses and the masses are born to be eaten by them. In order to eat the masses, the rulers have invented a very effective weapon called Democracy. Democracy in a poor country is a slaughterhouse and the poor masses are sacrificial animals. Democracy makes sense only in a country where every single citizen has the financial means to live reasonably comfortably. Unfortunately, most of the poor countries of the world are democracies. No wonder, the masses in these countries are extremely miserable. Bloody democracies Obviously, democracy in a backward country is a fake democracy. Only in advanced countries there is genuine democracy. A fake democracy is a very fertile woman. It keeps giving birth to various sorts of fake babies. It creates fake political elections. The fake elections create fake rulers. The fake rulers loot the national resources with religious fervour. The lootings make the miserable life of the masses more miserable. The masses protest. The fake rulers make fake promises to solve the masses problems. The rich rulers and the poor masses of a country are compatriots. But they are only nominally compatriots. Actually, they live in two different worlds, which are poles apart. It is said that when a ruler and a poor labourer of a poor country die, they are made equal in the dust. It is a fallacy. The rulers of a poor country and the masses live in a different world during life as well as after death. A poor citizen dies like a worm and his dead body is consigned to a heap of dust. But when a ruler dies, his dead body is ceremoniously laid in a precious coffin and a marble mausoleum is raised over his grave. Thus, even death fails to make the rulers and the poor masses equal in the dust. n The writer retired as Professor of the Department of English, Government College University, Lahore.