Trying to censor earthquakes

City Notes

I wonder what the militants have to do with the earthquakes in Iran and Iraq which killed 400 people. True, it was not the worst earthquake that had afflicted the two countries, but was still pretty bad, so bad that it was noticeable. And with so many dead, it was not possible that the militants didn’t get at least part of the blame. Some militants might well blame the Iraqi and Iranian governments, but the militants should get the blame. After all, they claim to know what the Almighty really wants, so they should be ready to take responsibility for what are called Acts of God.

On second thought, maybe militants have been so busy elsewhere they shouldn’t be blamed for the earthquakes. I mean, they are supposed to have not just killed an SP and his family in Quetta, but also a DIG. Not only should any cop posted in Balochistan be given up by his relatives, but one doesn’t know whom to blame. Is it militants? Or nationalists. Like those who killed 15 labourers in Turbat. I know Lenin once said that you can’t make an omelette without breaking eggs, and Mao did say that power flows out of the barrel of a gun, but even those taking their inspiration from Lenin or Mao (which would be about par for Baloch nationalists), should not be taking out labourers.

Of course, if they are indeed Indian agents, operating without the benefit of Kulbhushan Yadav, then they can’t really be blamed, can they? By the way, letting his wife come to see him might be either an act of compassion, or a very subtle punishment. Or even a sneaky way of making him wish to be executed. It all depends on his missus.

The militants are being blamed for the Tehrik Labbaik Ya Rasoolallah sit-in at Faizabad, even though the strikers are Brelvis, who are poster-boys for the more ‘moderate’ brand of Islam favoured by those on the American side in the War on Terror. True, the sit-in cost the life of one child, who couldn’t make it to PIMS, but that seems a small price to pay for ensuring the punishment of anyone trying to dilute the anti-Ahmadi declaration for public representatives. It seems a small price if one doesn’t know the child, of course.

Y’know, I’m not sure religion can carry the can for everything. Take the delay in the clearing of the film Verna by the censors. I didn’t know the film was about a criminal assault committed by a governor’s son. Now I do. And so do more people than will watch the film. I think governor’s sons are getting a bum rap. The worst I’ve ever heard about one is that he got sloshed to celebrate his father’s appointment, and picked up by the cops. Governor’s House asked for him back, and got him, but not before he was given a sound beating by the arresting SHO’s orders. The new governor didn’t complain, being too embarrassed at what his son had done.

Sons can be a pain. Look at Mian Nawaz’s sons, Hassan and Hussain, who have just not appeared before the accountability court hearing the reference against their father, sister and brother-in-law as well. The latter have been careful about appearing before the court, but the boys are reputedly wandering about London, wearing long kurtas and black dhotis, emitting a barhak at irregular intervals, and generally behaving as proclaimed offenders are supposed to.

Saad Hariri has not put on a long kurta, but he too is the son of a Prime Minister, the late Rafiq Hariri of Lebanon. Well, he himself is Prime Minister, and though the Saudi King has told him to resign, he hasn’t done so yet. In fact, he isn’t even in Lebanon. In Saudi Arabia his Oger Construction has declared bankruptcy after the Saudi government cancelled a passel of contracts after oil prices collapsed. The Saudi King, Salman, has got son problems of his own, what with Muhammad not only Crown Prince, but also tipped to become King after his father abdicates, remaining merely Khadimul Harmain.

In Zimbabwe, it’s the wife that is the problem, not the son. The Army there has overthrown Robert Mugabe, but not quite taken over. At one time, Zimbabwe dissolved its Air Force after it mutinied, and reformed it, borrowing a Pakistani to head it, Air Marshal Azeem Daudpota, who was later Sindh Governor under Musharraf. But now the Zimbabwe Army is a step ahead of the Pakistan Army. It’s carried out a coup, but it’s saying there’s no coup.

So next time, expect anyone calling the takeover a takeover to be declared an Indian agent who should be treated condignly. Is the 14-year-old in Hafizabad an Indian agent? The one who criminally assaulted a chicken, and killed it. If he isn’t, perhaps he should be, because Indians seem to have a thing about criminal assault. If they see one happening, they don’t try to stop it, but record it on their smartphone. In India, there are CDs doing the rounds, of assaults recorded on phones. It’s only a step away to see criminal assaults being conducted with actors.

Well, that hasn’t happened yet, except perhaps in Verna. But what has, is that the smog has been dissipated by rain. So we’ve entered winter at last.